The End of An Era: A Time Line

After 24 years of living in The House on Laurie Street, it all comes down to this:

June 16th, 2005
Daddy fell. Mac, instead of helping him, leaves him on the floor and calls Sissy. He says, in his evil voice, "I can't take the little boy who cried wolf anymore!" Sissy goes over to the house and calls an ambulance. She goes with Daddy to the emergency room, and takes mom with her.

June 19th, Father's Day
Maggie goes over to the house to check on the situation. Not good. Calls me. Tells me I need to come right away, we have to get them out of the house. Mac has, in Daddy's own words, "Gone off his nut."

June 21st
I arrive.

June 22nd
I visit three assisted living facilities. Sissy and I are unaware of just how bad things have gotten and don't know that both Mom and Daddy are far beyond the point of being able to live only with assistance.
We go to The Farm (a.k.a., The House on Laurie Street) to talk with Daddy. We tell him that he and Mom can't stay there anymore. Mac can't take care of them. We've been looking at places for them to go. He tells us he'll make sure we don't get a penny if we continue with our plans.

June 23rd
I have a horrible conversation with Mac. I call him, hoping to set up a lunch in order to talk about the situation. He tells me he's busy. I say I'd really like to talk to him. He sneers, "Oh, I KNOW." He tells me I am trying to ruin his life.

June 24th
Mac calls. Doesn't realize it's 1:00 a.m.
Mac calls again later in the morning, sounding just as normal as you please. We make plans for a sibling dinner Sunday night.

June 25th
Maggie and I visit assisted living places. Agree we like the one up the hill from The Farm the best.

June 26th
Mac calls at 9:00 a.m. asking Sissy to "deal with this crisis." Daddy wants to go to the emergency room. Sissy and I call the ambulance. We get him settled, finally, by 4:00.
We meet Mac for dinner. Oh, HELL NO he's not normal! Dinner is a narrowly averted catastrophe. He's manic, paranoid, aggressive, and extremely emotionally labile. Nominally friendly toward us, but the situation is dicey. Sissy and I are terribly nervous. He targets a man sitting at dinner with his wife and kids, making threatening gestures and loud comments. Somehow we manage to get through dinner and out of the restaurant before he gets arrested. We realized later we should've called the police ourselves.

June 27th
While Daddy is in the hospital, Lily Tomlin (that's who she looks like!) makes a home visit to evaluate Mom. She gives the go ahead. She must've also met Daddy at the hospital, although I don't remember this.

June 28th
We set up Mom's and Daddy's rooms. Mom moves in.

June 29th
Mom falls and cuts her head. Sissy and I meet her at the Emergency Room at 2:30 a.m.

June 30th
Daddy informs us he wants a joint room with Mom, and luckily there is one available, so we spend the day setting up their apartment.
Sissy stays over that night with Mom.

July 1st
Daddy arrives from the hospital on a stretcher. Ms. Tomlin is shocked and tells us this is not a good sign. She expected him to be ambulatory. In order for this to work, he needs to be able to keep an eye on, and help with, Mom.

July 2nd
Ms. Tomlin calls. It isn't going to work.

July 3rd
Day spent at the nursing home, meeting with people and filling out paperwork.

July 6th
We're given the green light to move Mom and Daddy to the nursing home. Mom will be on the locked unit for people with Alzheimer's, Daddy will be in a different area of the same floor.
When we arrive at the assisted living facility, there is an ambulance out front. It's for mom. She goes to the hospital. We take Daddy to the nursing home.

The next few days are spent cleaning out the apartment at the assisted living place and getting their rooms set-up at the nursing home. Mom spends a couple of days in the hospital. I no longer remember why she was there.

I do remember when she arrived at the nursing home. It was lunch time, and while Sissy dealt with various and sundry things, I went with her to the cafeteria and tried to have lunch with her. She was very unhappy. She slumped and couldn't understand and follow my instructions to sit up. She asked about her parents and going home. It was horrible.

And where was Mac throughout all this, you may ask? Gone crazy. That's where.